[Today’s episode] Experience the feeling of suffocating people with words

Original link: https://blog.frytea.com/archives/691/

75

A hotel receptionist who can’t understand basic dialogue logic

She told us: The front desk of the hotel is not responsible for receiving the courier, so don’t leave your courier here, there is a rookie station outside. Otherwise, we will not be responsible for the loss of the courier.
Us: Okay, we got it.
Courier: I put it at the front desk of the hotel for you, remember to pick it up.
Me: Doesn’t the front desk of the hotel not accept express delivery? Don’t put it there, put it in the station.
Courier: But I’ve already released it, and it’s gone far away, you go and get it, thank you.
(hang)
I’m going to get the courier.
Hotel front desk: I have told you many times that the front desk does not accept express delivery! Why is it still here?
Me: I know, I didn’t put it there, the courier insisted on putting it here, and the other person has gone far, sorry.
(Usually things end here, right?)
Hotel front desk: But our front desk does not accept express delivery, it is against the rules for you to put it here.
I:? ? ? The courier put it here, but he refused to listen to me.
Front desk: Let me tell you again, the front desk of our hotel does not accept express delivery.
(people around look over)
Me: Let me say it again, the courier put it here by himself, not I asked him to put it.
Front desk: But the front desk of our hotel is not responsible for receiving express delivery. If something is lost, we will not be responsible.
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? I know, I didn’t let it go.
Front desk: I know you still put the courier here? We don’t care if we lose it.
Me (totally pissed off): Let me ask you the fuck again, is there any vocabulary for the words ‘the courier put it, not me’ beyond what your mother’s deformed cerebellum can’t comprehend?
Front desk: Please have a better attitude. The front desk of our hotel is not allowed to deliver express delivery. This is a rule.
Me: Still in the process of delivery… What is the phone number of the lobby manager? Can’t take it anymore.
Front Desk: The manager is not there.
Me: The shopping applet has his phone number and the phone number of the general manager.
front desk:? ? ?
I don’t know which manager came here, anyway, he was wearing a suit and wearing a badge on the head of a classic hotel. He apologized to us as soon as he came, saying that the training for the employees was not in place.
I wrote a logical mind map to the front desk on the spot—starting from the logic of the dialogue, to figure out who didn’t understand.
As a result, after reading the mind map, the front desk directly turned on the Abba Abba mode (it’s not that I’m playing tricks maliciously, it’s that the front desk really started to talk about it.)
Then the front desk said aggrievedly: Originally, we didn’t accept express delivery here, I just reminded them not to forget.
As a result, the lobby manager is more aware of blind spots than I am: “Since you strictly enforce the regulations, how come the customer’s courier will appear at the front desk?”
front desk:? ? ? ? ? ? ? (Abaaba mode is on again)
Her colleague hurriedly explained: The courier let it in without authorization, so you should ask the security guard!
Lobby Manager: “Since you saw it was delivered by the courier with your own eyes, why do you force the customer over and over again not to leave the courier here? Was it the customer who released it? Isn’t it right?”
Then it was the receptionist: “Then why did the security guard let him go…”
The manager in the lobby got angry immediately (I should have gotten angry, but I didn’t expect the manager to get angry): “If it’s your own problem, just talk about your own problem, don’t blame others! Security? Why don’t you blame the hotel gate? If the guest doesn’t know, or the guest insists on putting something in us, we will make it clear that we will not be responsible for the loss! But the guest did not do this, our point is: the guest did not do this, but you said he did, Understand?”
In the end we got compensation for free drinks and water.
———————I still can’t understand the logic of the front desk. Since the manager at that time was already swearing, I didn’t have the nerve to ask.

“buying clothes”

In a women’s JK store, I saw a shopping guide who baffled me.
Accompany my sister to buy JK uniforms (uniforms for female high school students), and a girl wants to buy DK (uniforms for male high school students)
Shopping guide: This is men’s clothing.
Girl: I know, I want to try.
Shopping guide: But this one is for men.
girl:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
The girl had no choice but to explain the situation: “Our club’s activities, our girls also wear this kind of men’s uniform to perform, so I want to try it.”
Shopping guide: Then why don’t you buy women’s models? This is for men.
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
Girl: We only buy men’s models, is there anything I can wear?
The shopping guide suddenly began to tidy up the clothes casually: “You can’t wear it, this is a men’s style.”
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
Girl: Get me a smaller one, I’ll try a smaller coat.
Shopping guide: There is no trumpet size for men’s models.
Girl: what size are the men’s models?
Shopping guide: You can’t wear it, after all, it’s a men’s style.
Girl: But I haven’t tried yet.
Shopping guide: You don’t even need to try it. Men’s models are different from women’s models. Why do you insist on trying men’s models? Definitely can’t wear it.
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
The girl finally rolled her eyes and left. The shopping guide was still there arranging clothes, and then an aunt came over and asked her: “I don’t know about these, do you have any recommendations?”
Shopping guide (without looking at the aunt): “You can’t wear them, these are student clothes, you can’t wear them.”
Auntie: “?????? I’ll buy it for my daughter… Forget it, let’s go, it’s really troublesome to buy something here.”
I also took my sister and left. I don’t know who is used to these stores. Don’t say that the two-dimensional rules are different. If you are really noble, you don’t need to open a store in three-dimensional. You should open a store online to buy paper. The filmmakers receive two-dimensional coins to eat virtual meals.

birthday cake event

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When I lived in Wenjiang, I encountered cake shop incidents:
Guest: I’m in a hurry. How long does it take you to make a birthday cake?
Clerk: What size do you want?
Guest: Five inches is fine, I want this kind of chocolate.
Clerk: OK, it will take XX hours to make it now, can you wait?
Guest: It’s been a while, forget it.
(Is this normal? But what I encountered was this:
Guest: I’m in a hurry. I want to buy a birthday cake as soon as possible. How long is the fastest time for you to make the cake?
Clerk: No, it won’t be ready soon.
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
guest:? ? ? ? ? ? ?
Guest: How long does it usually take you to make a cake?
Clerk: Really not soon.
guest:? ? ? ? ? ? ? Just tell me how long it will take to make a cake right now, okay?
Clerk: 10-inch usually takes XX hours, do you think you can do it?
Guest: In time. In this way, I want one of this (referring to the cake model in the window), and I need to take it away as soon as possible, and make an eight-inch one. I have to catch a plane later, so you can order it as soon as possible.
Clerk: I understand your feelings, but this is a model that cannot be taken away.
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
guest:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? I’m catching a plane, so don’t make fun of me, clerk: Oh, so you make it now, right?
Guest: Nonsense.
Clerk: So what kind of cake do you want?
Guest: … This (referring to the window), make an eight-inch one, will you make it faster if it is smaller?
Clerk: So is it eight inches?
Guest: I was asking if the smaller size would make it faster? Like five inches?
Clerk: So is it five inches or eight inches?
Guest: Are you kidding me? I’m catching a plane and I’m going to take a cake with me. Can you answer quickly?
Clerk: Excuse me…do you want eight inches or five inches?
Me: He’s in a hurry! Please hurry up and make him a five-inch chocolate forest cake! The sample number is 24! Please do it faster! I understand!
Clerk: OK——but we can’t make it soon, so you still want to make it fresh?
guest:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
The baker behind the window: ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
I said to the customer: In this way, bro, you go to the food delivery software to order a cake shop closest to the airport where you arrive, order a cake, and take a taxi to pick it up after you get off the plane, which is better than wasting time here.
The customer thanked me, scolded the clerk and left.

“The Lever at Work”

I sort of understand why some bosses start yelling at a stupid assistant.
I went to a company to help people change the shooting. I asked the assistant to change a few scenes of the sub-shots. He typed, and I said.
He said that it cannot be changed, it is all written.
I said that after the change, I will negotiate with the client, and he doesn’t have to worry about the rest, just change it.
Assistant: This is what the customer ordered.
Me: The customer said that it can be changed, so I told them.
Assistant: But I haven’t received any news from my side.
Me: They chatted privately with me, let me show you (passing the phone).
Assistant: But I didn’t receive the message, you just can’t do it.
Me: What do you mean you didn’t receive the message? Do you need the boss to send you a message to confirm?
Assistant: It’s just that I haven’t received any news from here.
Me: What news do you need? Is it the client’s or the boss’s?
Assistant: (rolling eyes) I just didn’t receive it. If I didn’t receive the message, I didn’t receive it. I can’t change it.
Me: …Then I change it myself? You go drink tea, I’ll make it here.
Assistant: You have to tell the screenwriter and the cameraman that this is a storyboard written by the screenwriter and also ordered by the client.
Me: But the customer said they want to change it.
Assistant: Where’s the screenwriter?
Me: The screenwriter is of course listening to the client’s request.
Assistant (a little dazed): Oh… Then… What did the boss say?
Me: I was invited by the boss to change the storyboard and script.
Assistant: Oh…but do the screenwriters know?
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? –Know.
Assistant: Do they all know the photographer?
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? You don’t want to change me to change, okay?
Assistant: No, this is the company’s computer, and outsiders cannot use it.
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Send me the storyboard file.
Assistant: OK.
He sent a PDF format (picture mode) over.
I:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? Why?
Assistant: Because this storyboard is fixed, we can only send it in PDF format.
Me: But I want to change it… Forget it, you’re really good, wait for me.
In the end, I called the boss, and the boss called him. I could hear the boss yelling on the other end of the phone, and then another person came to help me type.
That is, when filming, I can no longer see him (really fired), which is great.
The boss told me that he was lucky to have met me. If he went to meet the client, the client would probably withdraw his capital and leave.
Because the customer asked him a question before, he also insisted on giving a few words.
The customer wanted to see the samples, and he replied: We haven’t finished cutting, and we have to send the complete ones.
The client said to send me the finished cut, and he replied: Then you have to ask the editor, not me.
client:? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?
Client: Where is the WeChat editor?
Him: Wait a minute.
Then he asked the client to wait, and after waiting for a day, the editor finished cutting the thing, and he sent the complete sample to the client.
The customer was furious when he received the sample for the first time.

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