Original link: https://onojyun.com/2022/11/01/7682/
△ 305｜If I turn into an insect, will you still love me?
I have collected two short stories that happened on the plane. One of them is that someone asked the strange question “Would you still love me if I turned into an insect?”.
The first story is that on American Airlines, a male passenger broke up with his girlfriend on the flight, thinking that his girlfriend could control him in public. As a result, his girlfriend collapsed on the spot. Before taking off, the crew asked her to get off the plane. Later, it developed into a situation where she was forced to get off the plane. As a result, her girlfriend refused to leave, and she kept begging for her “ex-boyfriend” who had just become. “.
The second story is that on a foreign flight, a girlfriend asked her boyfriend, “Would I still love me if I became an insect boyfriend?”, but the boyfriend didn’t answer “yes”, and the girlfriend cried bitterly on the plane , feel that he has not received the answer of “true love”.
I don’t remember if Franz Kafka’s Metamorphoses was a textbook article, but I was very impressed with it. A salesman wakes up to find himself a “beetle” who can no longer return to society and support his entire family, confined to his room all day to survive on moldy bread and spoiled milk. My favorite thing is hanging upside down from the ceiling and rethinking how I’m going to deal with my life after becoming a beetle.
“The Metamorphosis” should not have a clear positioning. I think it should belong to absurd realism novels, because adding the framework of “reality”, its own absurdity and irony are multiplied. Although the story assumes an event that is almost impossible to happen in real life, about a person becoming a beetle, it seems to be the most direct, straightforward, and most easily perceived “absurd” ——In fact, people in reality will be socially obliterated by the whole society because of such actions, which is more complicated than turning into a beetle; and when he is forgotten by the whole society, it is more complicated than he has become. A beetle is more terrifying; of course, someone will ask more exaggerated questions than “Would you still love me if I turned into a beetle”, but it requires more clear answers.
For example, there are two emotional “trap questions” before, which are much more absurd than “Will you still love me if I become an insect?”, but they also make people feel “this is very realistic” – “If If we are not together, will you cheat with me when you meet me?” “If my girlfriend and I swap souls, will you choose my body or my soul?”
At least they become beetles, and many things are “solved”, they are no longer human, and it is easier to “handle” them, so people think this problem is too absurd and has no social significance – but it extends the problem. Can be much more specific and outrageous.
On a business trip these few days, my colleague was obviously anxious because he received a short message about epidemic prevention and control. Like facing a question of “Will you still love me if I become an insect?”, he began to really think about whether he would become an insect that no one loves and loves. So I suggest that everyone go back to the hotel to rest early, and if this continues, the function of the prefrontal cortex will soon be lost.
On the way back to the hotel, we asked this anxious colleague – what are you worried about? He answered honestly that he was worried that the cat at home would not be taken care of. We then asked, can we ask someone else to take care of it? Okay – who’s taking care of it now? There were also people – so what’s there to worry about?
He just fell into the core of “would you still love me if I turned into an insect?”. First of all, he thought of himself as the insect, and began to worry about when he really turned into an insect. has limited mobility and must live on moldy bread and spoiled milk. Obviously, when he was a human, he didn’t want to eat these two disgusting things. But in Metamorphoses, Gregor, turned into a beetle, loves these two foods – I abstract this anxiety from Metamorphoses, but this is the form of anxiety – when someone proposes Asked “Would you still love me if I turned into an insect?”, they really began to worry about whether they would turn into an insect.
Obviously, he couldn’t solve his anxiety in the end. When he accepted that “his pet can be taken care of”, his anxiety was obviously solved a lot, but he still failed to solve the most terrible problem – he What if it became an insect? That is, if his health code is really “socially obliterated” because of epidemic prevention and control, how can he become an “insect” to survive. This is actually quite understandable, because he is a person who cares very much about the “sense of control”, so the uncertainty brought about by the epidemic itself will make him tend to collapse, so he finally left a sentence that I think is quite philosophical: ” I’m going to die at home” – of course, Gregor also turned into a giant beetle in the bedroom at home.
Before I “died” last year, I was also a person who would have anxiety at any time, because I was afraid of losing control, so I had a period of time to manage self-abuse. So I can understand the process of this anxiety too well. Taking the core of “Metamorphosis” as an example, when someone asks the question “Would you still love me if I become an insect?”, the anxiety person’s focus is “what if I really become an insect?” , and the way to get rid of anxiety is to solve the problem “Can people really become insects” from the periphery of the problem.
I believe that the person who asked her boyfriend this question on the plane got the answer that her boyfriend didn’t really love her – but what the boyfriend thought was probably: you don’t go crazy, you How can it become an insect. Anxiety creates uncertainty between these two mismatched questions and answers.
Although my colleague is currently concerned about whether the cat will be taken care of, he is more worried about whether he will be able to take care of the cat before he dies, so the “method” that we ask that question and find a solution is itself wrong, even It will increase his anxiety, because he starts to worry that if he can’t go back, or if he really “turns into a beetle”, he will not be able to take care of his cat. So the answer to this question doesn’t solve the “he feared himself becoming a beetle” problem.
So I deeply reviewed myself later. The way to solve anxiety is not to face anxiety directly. It is a method only used by people who have a clear logic and know that they can solve their anxiety step by step. The most direct way to solve anxiety is to go back to the original question “Will you become an insect?” Obviously, when solving this problem, there will be a serious internal paradox – they know that they will not, But I am convinced of the tragedy after turning into a beetle – replace this core, I know I will not become positive, because I only checked the nucleic acid 24 hours ago, but I have begun to worry that if I am quarantined, I will The plot that will die at the isolation point because of various inconveniences.
“Considering the worst” isn’t the best way to deal with anxiety, but it is the most murderous and destructive rule of thumb for getting anxiety solved all at once. But anxious people certainly don’t have the courage to contemplate the worst possible outcome. So unfortunately, I haven’t found a “painless” method yet, so what I uphold is “it’s better to turn yourself into an insect”. When people experience the worst results, they naturally know that some anxiety itself is ineffective. It is used – “Liu Yin Hua Ming You Yi Village” is not an ancient text that needs to be recited and dictated, but it contains a kind of mystery between heaven and earth.
Of course, this “desensitization treatment” itself is too cruel, just like the Nazi human laboratory to modern medicine.
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