bullying that doesn’t exist

Original link: https://onojyun.com/2022/06/20/6222/

△ 171| Bullying that does not exist

When I was a student, I really didn’t hear anything about “bullying”, but it was only after I became an adult that I heard the fact of “bullying” from my classmates, just because I didn’t see it or experienced it, so I didn’t know it. Instinctively, it felt like it didn’t exist.

In fact, the topic of campus bullying has always existed, and it has been presented on the stage for a short period of time. However, it is conceivable that the fact that “everyone can be defined as non-existence as long as they do not see it”, if it is really taken When they came to the stage, some parents felt that their children would imitate the “badness” inside. This kind of logic that makes people fanciful only when there is a raw film is also one of the reasons why many things “do not exist”. So in China, if we don’t mention it, maybe “bullying” doesn’t exist.

I specifically went to see the release time of “The Resentful House Honpo”, which was in the interval from 2007 to 2009. During that period, Japan’s school bullying had been put on the table for discussion. “The House of Resentment” is one of them, except that it expresses school bullying in a relatively “cruel” way – that is, using the same method to retaliate against the bully.

From another angle, if “The House of Resentment” were filmed and published in China, it would definitely lead to a group of contradictions – why should we describe the school bullying carried out by women against women? There will be no school bullying against women – after all, on campus, men are as high as 20% of the bullying perpetrators!

The other 80% is something, as long as it is not said, seen, or discussed – then it can be regarded as non-existent.

It is a pity that “school violence” in Chinese society is more like a conjecture. This conjecture is based on “everyone’s uncertainty”, because not everyone has really seen campus bullying, even if campus bullying happens, It is also very likely that it will be covered up and redefined by various forces – of course the school does not admit the existence of campus bullying, so this is a kind of riot among students; those students who care about whether their children will be disqualified from exams because of this Parents, they will not let their children admit that they have carried out bullying; the most absurd and reasonable is the teachers and parents who should have been the stoppers. They will correct the existence of bullying and consider them as “victims” There was some kind of fault in himself that made him the target of bullying.

Do these stories exist? Of course they would not admit that, even if it happened, it would eventually return to the responsibility of the “victim”. There is a double-standard paradox here. If an adult woman is raped by a man because of her behavior, no matter whether the woman’s pre-order behavior is at fault or not, a man should not hit a woman; then the paradox appears. , On campus, if a female student is raped by a female student because of one of her behaviors, it should be discussed whether women should not do anything to women, or whether the girl has done something that provokes public anger, so even if she is raped, “Excusable” – of course, if a man beats a woman, it must be the man’s fault; if a woman beats a man, it is the man’s fault, if he is right, why would a woman beat him; if a woman beats a man Hit the woman – that should also be the fault of the men, because those men stood by and stood by.

When I was young, I was a student who could play with good students and get close to “bad” students. So I also see the things they put into violence. At that time, I did not stand up, because persuasion itself had no practical significance for resolving the conflict between them. It is very simple, if A is bullied by the small circle called by B for a long time, then if A does not resist, he will become a punching bag used by the group B to prove that B has leadership value. If it were me, I could only think of a way to suggest A to resist – because obviously, asking A to ask the teacher for help, the teacher will not necessarily help him, and even punish A and B as the same role , such an outcome will cause A to become even more the target of B’s ​​bullying.

Later, A also has the ability to convene. The first thing he has to do is to fight against B’s group, because this is the rule of his survival – I used to be very serious with the “little gangsters” in my class after school. After talking about this, in fact, many times, they have no choice. If they do not resort to violence, they will only be regarded as the target of bullying. This is their simple rule. They don’t even need to fight against the so-called “good students”, but the “good students” always evaluate them on the basis of morality. Even if they don’t provoke them, they will give Teachers sued “bad students”, arguing that they destroyed the space of “good students”. But there is no need for them to target “good students”, because these indifferent confrontations will only lead to more conflicts. What they have to do is to survive under B’s bullying.

Are these stories true? You haven’t experienced them anyway, and you can say they don’t exist. But if anyone is going through it, they’re going to come out and point the noses of others bossily and blame those who stand by – why don’t you come out and stop them!

Therefore, bullying cannot exist at all, because the group of people who were named should stand up to stop bullying, they did not stand up, so they are also bullies – until they also become the target of bullying, and those who point out What is the role of someone who asks them to stand up and stop bullying?

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